Jul. 25, 2022

Receiving with Grace

There are many stories about the love of a dog. They have such a deep capacity of unconditional love that it staggers the imagination. At any time, no matter how long we have been away from them, they are eager to love us once more. There are unending stories of their sacrificial love and their incredible ability to comfort during the lowest moments of our lives that will always bring tears to my eyes. Yes, dogs never fail to set an example of what it means to love someone. But there is something else they do that we should all take notice of. That endless capacity to give love is coupled with a phenomenal grace to receive love.

I have written on several occasions about how difficult it can be to be a gracious recipient. I think the saying, “It is better to give than to receive” comes from an understanding of how important it is to show others how much we care about them, but the gift is diminished if it is not received with grace. Being a gracious recipient is just as, if not more, important then being a generous giver.

Gifts of love can come in many forms. They don’t have to be physical presents or have a monetary cost; they can be simple acts of kindness or even compliments. I had an older lady come into my office with some questions about her property. We stood at the counter for a bit talking about her house, but also about her children and grandchildren. I love to listen to older people tell stories, and they love to share them. At one point in the conversation, she paused, looked me in the eye and said, “You are very pretty! Is it okay if I say that?”

I smiled and laughed a little. “Of course, it’s okay,” I said. “Thank you very much.” It was such a sweet moment. It not only brightened my day, but I think it brightened hers a bit, too. I didn’t brush it off or embarrass her by making it awkward. I simply received the compliment with grace and humble appreciation. The way I received that small gift made the giving of it that much sweeter for both of us.

In much the same way, my dog is always ready to let me love him. He will lay quietly next to me or on the floor at my feet and, at any moment, I could reach out to him, and he will be ready to let me love him. I can scratch his ribs with my fingernails, bury my fingers in the thick fur around his ears, rest my head on his shoulder, or kiss the little depression between his eyebrows and he will just lay there ready to let me love him. As soon as he feels my touch, his body relaxes, his breathing changes and he looks in my eyes as if to say, “Yes, mom, bring on all the love! I’m ready for it.”

It brings me so much joy to shower him with love because of the way he receives it. He doesn’t walk away or dismiss it like he isn’t worthy. He knows his worth so, he leans into it and takes it all in as if his very purpose in life is to let me love him.

We should be more like that with each other. When someone does something thoughtful for you, offers a hand, a compliment, a kindness, instead of making a show of not being worthy or fearing an obligation to reciprocate, try receiving it graciously. Say, “Thank you, that is so kind of you and I truly appreciate it.” Being a gracious recipient is the return gift. And we are all worthy. Be brave. Be kind.